IS HORSE SHIT LITTER OR NOT?

I live about 100 yards from the main Police Headquarters building in Liverpool. Amongst other things, they co-ordinate their mounted patrols, i.e. coppers on horseback, from there.

Now, let me make it clear - I'm absolutely in favour of more police, and in particular more highly visible police, on the streets of our towns and cities. I'm a law-abiding kind of fella, not a criminal scumbag, so if I'm ever going to have dealings with the boys in blue, it's more than likely that it'll be because I need their help, not because I've done something wrong.

Back to the coppers on horseback.

The mounted patrols tend to follow the same route as they leave the HQ, and this route sees them walk along the street I live on. On a quiet night, even if I have all of the windows of my second-floor apartment closed, I can actually hear them clip-clopping past on their way into the city centre. So far, so peachy.

Sometimes, even if I haven't heard them, it's clear that they have been past. And the reason I know they've been past is the half ton of stinking horse shit that's been deposited down the middle of the road.

Now, I ask you - if I had a a dog, and let it do a massive shit in the street in full view of two coppers, and then carried on my merry way without clearing it up, would I be nicked? You can bet your bloody poop-a-scoop I would! If I dropped an empty crisp packet, could I be done for littering? Oh yes.

Come on officers.... clean up your horse shit eh

Smoking ban.... not happy

The smoking ban has been in force in England now for..... what, a couple of years or so now?

Have you noticed what a lot of smokers do now though? They leave pubs/bars/restaurants to go outside to feed their pathetic stinking dirty habit, but only JUST outside of the building, kind of half-in, half-out. What is it with these people? No smoking inside INCLUDES the doorway entrance you muppets, so shift well clear of the building. I shouldn't have to walk through the carcinogenic stinking cloud beng created by a bunch of tabby bastards huddled half-in and half-out of a bar. And equally, if I'm sat inside somewhere, I shouldn't be subjected to a lung-full of the stuff that gets wafted in everytime the bloody door opens.

And don't get me started on people blowing shit-loads of smoke in my general direction when I'm out and about in public..... if I had my way, smoking would be banned in ALL public places, INSIDE AND OUT. Do it in your own homes.

If ever you get into a debate with a smoker about this, they always trot out the line "But if you banned smoking totally in public, less people would smoke, just think about how much the government would lose in tax".

Do me a favour. Yep, the government does raise shit-loads of revenue in tax from smokers..... and then promptly shells it all out again via the squillions of pounds that it costs the NHS in treating illness and disease that is directly attributable to smoking.

I say BAN SMOKING IN ALL PUBLIC PLACES.

Birds that follow the flock

Ugg boots?
Oversize belt?
Fake tan?
Bleach blond hair?

You're a walking cliche. Get a fucking grip